


in you, everything sank

by ultraviolence



Category: Magic: The Gathering
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Gideon is a party crasher, how catching up should have ended, what happens in Ravnica stays in Ravnica
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 07:36:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5777098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ultraviolence/pseuds/ultraviolence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liliana Vess does not rely on anyone. Liliana Vess made her own way in the world. She doesn’t wear her heart on her sleeve. It was actually doubtable that she even had a heart at all. This is a crazy, crazy gambit, and she shouldn't have gotten her feelings involved in the first place. // How Catching Up should have ended. AU at the end, oneshot, mostly fluff. Contained Agents of Artifice references and spoilers. Set before and during CU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	in you, everything sank

**Author's Note:**

> There is a curious lack of Jace/Lili fics around here. I strived to fix that. Title originally taken from [here](http://mindmagic.co.vu/post/137728335424/you-swallowed-everything-like-distance-like-the). I hope I didn't botch anything; it's been a while since I've read AoA & Catching Up (+ Unkindness of Ravens), and I'm pretty much new around the block. Well, without further ado, enjoy!

It was a crazy gambit, Liliana knows.

A crazy, crazy gambit. When the idea crossed her mind, she almost slapped herself for even thinking about it, for then entertaining the idea and already drafting the means she could employ to achieve her objective. It baffled her completely, too, that the idea took root in her mind comfortably, like it was the most rational solution, or, heavens forbid, it was _meant_ to be there.

She had to raise hell afterwards to make herself feel like, well, _herself,_ again. 

Liliana Vess does not rely on anyone. Liliana Vess made her own way in the world. Liliana Vess does not see people as people, but rather as means to an end. The only good people are _dead_ people. With dead people, at least, she knows where she stood with them – as their mistress. There was simply no possibility for them to betray her, much less to confuse her with unnecessary feelings or load her with equally unnecessary baggage. Not that he dumped the latter on her, mind – one thing that she liked about their relationship is that they kept to each other for the most part, where emotional baggage are concerned. He doesn’t like messy emotional scenes and she doesn’t want any baggage – it was a working arrangement.

(Of course, she also discovered that behind his independent, detached veneer, he’s very much lost, but she thought that it was adorable. She liked both laughing _at_ him and laughing _with_ him.)

What’s _not_ working is the fact that he ditched her at the end and forced her to face Bolas alone with the failure. _Her_ failure.

Part of her eternally blamed herself for that – she was getting too cocky, thinking that she knows him, that she knows what makes him tick, believed that she managed to chart him, map him out, but the thing about water is that it _flows_. Often in an unexpected direction, and with a disastrous consequence.

And she doesn’t know if she couldn’t forgive him or herself more.

But here she was, thinking about seeing him again. More than that, she was thinking about seeing him again _and_ asking him for help. If that isn’t crazy, Liliana doesn’t know what is. Her best hope is that Jace isn’t over her (either), and his, well, _better_ nature (although it can be argued that almost everyone else in the Multiverse had better nature than her, excepting Bolas and maybe Tezzeret). It’s not much, but she had faced worse odds before.

It’s not much, but it might be her best chance.

(She doesn’t like calling it “redemption”, it makes it sound like she’s truly sorry for all the atrocities that she had done, whether in pursuit for more power or for fun. She’s not.)

With this in mind, Liliana Vess, necromancer, planeswalker, and villainess extraordinaire, planeswalked to Ravnica.

 

* * *

It wasn’t hard to locate him, once she arrived at the sprawling city-plane. Ravnica was just as she remembered it to be – the sounds and smell of a thousand different people and things, a riot of colour and a splash of fashion shock (a whirl of Izzet’s characteristic blue-red riotous garment here, austere Orzhov white there), everything constantly in movement, people everywhere, and, worse of all: the spirits, on top of it all. She could hear the spirits, even over the din of a shouting match that had just begun somewhere to her left (probably involving a Rakdos and a Boros, from the sounds of it).

She instantly felt dizzy and overwhelmed by the sheer loudness of it all (Ravnica tends to do that to a planeswalker, and she haven’t been here in a while, after all), and the Onakke was whispering her things, but she forced herself to move – the Azorius would probably be here soon, since things have taken a more violent turn and other Rakdos were joining in the fray, like moths to a flame (a fitting metaphor, she thought), and the stuffy law enforcers would surely start sniffing around soon. They never really allow any fun to happen. She scoffed lightly at the thought, and joined the crowd, away from the fight, only narrowly missing a heavily mutated Simic elf heading her way.

She regained her bearings not long after (nothing ever bothered Liliana Vess for too long), and started gathering information. It’s not hard to find what sort of thing he got himself mixed in and what he’s been up to these days, she found, as apparently he had made quite a name (and a reputation, too) for himself. He had come a long way from where he was, certainly, and that left her…where?

She fought to keep her thoughts to herself, and to keep her emotions in check. She had dealt with the sort of scum that she was hiring as her informant before - it wouldn’t do to show anything that could be interpreted as a weakness. A personal reaction is an opening, and an opening leave her vulnerable to attack, and questions. Her authority should be absolute, here. Of course, she was itching to kill the man and raise him as an undead minion (she had to drum her fingers on the wooden table to stop herself from taking his life and use her magic on him), but she understood the necessity of keeping him alive for the time being.

“Why d’ you care so much about the Livin’ Guildpact? Ya had a beef with him or somethin’?”

“I thought that I’ve made it clear,” She said softly, looking down on him from across the table, one boot propped up, eyes starting to glow an otherworldly purple, “that you should not ask questions.”

That should teach him, she thought, watching him as he shuts up and quivered in fear. This is an accomplished criminal around here? I should take over, she continued, smugly, basking in that well-deserved fear.

 

* * *

 

Fear is a good motivator, according to Liliana Vess. For other people, of course, not for her. She fancied herself as a being completely free from fear – for when you had access to power and more power, and got rid of the repercussions, fear had no hold on you – but truth be told, she feared that she would fail in this effort to enlist his help for her plight (she doesn’t like playing the damsel in distress, even if she knows he liked playing hero – a bit too much in her opinion – but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do) even more than she feared her remaining demonic debtors. The Chain Veil was taking its toll on her. She can’t deny it. She can keep running away, but she can’t deny it, and running away solves nothing.

Moreover, Liliana suddenly developed a chronic fear of seeing him again.

The thought itself spawned an unwanted list of questions: how is he now? How is he _really_ doing? Does he still think of her? Of their affair? Does he hate her for all the things that she did to him (and his friends, by extension)? Does he think about her _at all_? 

Most importantly: had he changed?

She briefly thought of the lost boy she knew, often lost in thought (whether his own or others, but not hers, never hers), who misplaced things often, never comb his hair, and do things like leaving the stove on. She thought of their banter, their shared secrets, their inside jokes, the people whom they’ve talked about behind their backs. She thought about his smirks, his books, the way his hair sticks up marvelously in the mornings, the oddly charming way he kissed her. She thought about his shy smiles, her lies, and how he left her, in the end.

An eye for an eye made the world blind, an old adage popped up in her mind. But it’s good for him, she thought, that means he’d learnt a crucial lesson. Never trust other people. Not completely, not _at all_.

Yet here she was, in Ravnica, tracking him down, standing on his doorstep, and she had never felt lonelier.

She put on her best defiant look, and knocked on the door.

 

* * *

 

It doesn’t go the way she wanted it to be, of course. At least she was right about one thing: Jace _was_ unpredictable. And he’d changed. He doesn’t seem to notice it (for all the knowledge he had clamouring about in his head, and for all the power available at his disposal, he can be curiously blind sometimes), but he had changed, incrementally, in ways that count, and she had to stop herself from staring.

The interrogation, though – she had fully expected it, and she came in prepared. But not prepared enough for his questions, apparently, and the issue of Garruk. If he was somebody else, she would simply dodge his questions, but she needed his help. And she needed _him_ , as much as she hated to admit.

Still, despite his apparent grumpiness regarding her presence, both in his sanctum and Ravnica, his qualms over the criminal she’d finally killed and resurrected (he was useful, but he had outlived his usefulness), and the past, he still had a lingering fondness and fascination for her. It was easy to tell, plain as day – from the way he looked at her to how he plays along instead of simply sending her away. She knows that he was curious (always the primary motive, with Jace), but there was more to it than that.

She understood, perfectly, that this was a combination he was unable to refuse: a puzzle she only hinted at, and herself in trouble, also something she only allowed him vague glimpses of.

She told herself that he no longer held sway over her, that she was the one in control here, but she knows that it’s a lie.

 

* * *

Dinner was worse. Liliana found herself falling back into the old rhythm they had shared back during their days as runaways from the Consortium (despite his obvious awkwardness with social interactions, it was easy to feel comfortable with him), and she found herself laughing with him once more, talking with him casually, teasing, feeling more at ease than she had ever been, despite herself. She blamed the wine. The rose he’d brought for her earlier made everything even worse – she could feel herself reaching for it even now, could feel herself reaching for _him_.

She wondered why she even suggested getting dinner in the first place. She doesn’t like emotional baggage. She doesn’t want any. She’s not one to get lost in the lies nostalgia spun. And yet, and yet. She was here, she was _still_ here, and she couldn’t pull herself away even if she tried.

They had _something_ , that much she would concede.

Anything more than that, she doesn’t want to think about it. They used to have something, at least, until she started betraying him and he retaliated with that final betrayal at the end. But he was collateral damage, she thought dispassionately, it had been her fault that she was caught in the crash, too.

It had been her fault that she had fell for him and brought her heart on the table.

Liliana cursed herself for letting this happen to her. This was an amateur mistake, a _stupid_ mistake…and it happened to other people, not her. Not Liliana Vess. She had lived for a long time, defeated two out of four demons, cursed another planeswalker, committed countless atrocities, and other things besides. She was anything but a rookie. She doesn’t wear her heart on her sleeve. It was actually doubtable that she even had a heart at all. Most people would simply laugh at the thought of her having something as human and fragile as a _heart_.

But he looked at her from across the table, waiting for her to tell him about what and why she’s here for, about her problems, and she could feel her resolve softening. She had a soft spot for him, she was growing soft _because_ of him, and she hated herself for that. But she doesn’t feel sorry.

That’s when the dumb Boros beefcake blundered in.

She was seething even as she listened to him speak – trouble at another plane, need your help, blah blah blah. She rolled her eyes discreetly, crossed her legs, leaned back on her seat, and patiently waited for him to go away. Liliana Vess could be patient when she needed to. She’d lived a long life, and she was quite sure Jace would turn him down anyway, so what’s wrong with a little more waiting?

Obviously, she was soon proven to be wrong. She looked at him indignantly, glanced at beefcake (who turned out not to be “just” a Boros but a planeswalker too, but a dumb one at that – the right thing? Who in their right mind would say that with a straight face?), and scoffed. Then she drained what’s left from her wine, stood up, and walked away.

There, she thought to herself sarcastically, what a good plan.

“Lili, wait--“ 

He called out after her, but she paid him no mind. She was already purging him from her mind, distancing herself from the events that had transpired, filed it as failure, and vowed never to visit Ravnica again. Not until he’s dead.

She was very good at ignoring people (further reinforced by her originally noble birth), and most people usually know better than to keep bothering her after she ignored them (anyway, it was better to be ignored than to be noticed by Liliana Vess, most of the time), but this one is something special. Jace actually went after her and even matched her pace. She wanted nothing more than to immediately planeswalk away, but he looked extremely determined, and she was rather certain that he would follow her to the Blind Eternities if he had to. It looks like she had to solve this here – once and for all.

She stopped, then, but only because she felt sorry for him.

“You don’t know when to stop, do you?”

She could feel her rage bubbling up inside of her, a firestorm that could only spell disaster, and she had to hold herself back. She’d come all the way here, seek him out despite everything – despite her _pride_ , and the past – and she had faith that he would help her, truly believed that things would be fine again between them, but then _someone_ had to rain on her parade, and Jace had disappointed her. She had went all this way for…what, exactly? She doesn’t know which she hated more: the party crasher (she had call him more names in her mind in a minute than she’d ever done before, which says a lot about her feelings towards him), Jace, or herself for being so foolish. She had let nostalgia and her fondness for him led her on a wild goose chase, and now she’s paying for that mistake. Stupid, stupid Liliana.

(“We were never old friends,” He had told her earlier, and now it felt like a slap in the face, like a wave receding and now hitting her with its full force as it crashed on the shore. _Of course_ they were never friends. Friends don’t sleep and flirt with each other. Friends don’t kiss each other they way they do, friends don’t ask for a romantic dinner, friends don’t buy the other flowers. And for god’s sake, friends _don’t_ get jealous over the other’s planesbound friend, like she did with Emmara. Everything should have meant nothing to her, and yet, it all means something…they don’t even have a _name_ for their relationship. She shouldn’t have cared about it so much, that’s not what planeswalkers does, at least not her sort, and yet.)

“You don’t understand,” He tried to explain, rather belatedly, and lamely, for that matter. “It was my fault, sort of. I have to set things right.”

 _And choose another plane over me?_ She wanted to demand, to spat in his face. _You shouldn’t let that beefcake boss you around. He’s not your boss. Zendikar is not your responsibility._

 _But you are_ , he said, in her mind. _You are my responsibility, Lili._

 _Don’t give me that shit_ , she snorted, responded in kind. _I’m nobody’s responsibility. I’m only responsible for myself. If you want to help me because you pitied me, or want to set things right, then don’t._  

 _You need to get that hero complex tuned down_ , she added sarcastically, almost as an afterthought.

To her surprise, he laughed.

“Why are you laughing?” She snapped, genuinely confused. “That’s it, I’m out of here. Enjoy your stay in Zendikar with Mr. Do The Right Thing. Bring lots of your books and papers because I bet it’s going to be a really dull affair.”

“Nothing,” He answered, with a grin. She felt the urge to slap him and planeswalk away. Or better yet, she wanted to summon one of her undead minions and let them do the slapping instead. But that means using the power of the Chain Veil. Liliana could feel a part of her slowly sinking at the thought of it, as if someone had weighed it down with rocks and fill that part of her with water.

“Lili,” He said, snapping her out of her reverie. The… _tenderness_ in his voice took her by surprise, and she found herself feeling not quite so livid at him anymore. Stupid, stupid Jace. “I’m going to find you again, soon after I’m done with Zendikar. We’ll resume that talk.”

 _I promise_ , he added telepathically. _And I’m sorry._

“And leave this plane to its own devices?” She snorted at her own joke, wholeheartedly amused at the thought. “Ravnica will fall.”

“Don’t get sassy with me.”

“It’s _my_ job,” She found herself smiling like a fool, and she doesn't feel self-conscious about it this time. “Someone should keep you in line. Now go back to your Big Tan and Dumb All Over friend, he’s waiting for you. Would probably start blundering into things if you left him alone for too long.”

“Lili,” He sighed. “Don’t be mean.”

She laughed, linking her arm with his. He looked so far away already, she thought, wistfully. Already thinking about Zendikar. Already going away from her. People always left her, in the end, whether because of their mortality (a wisp, a dream, a memory about her brother and the distant life that she’d once lived, a long long time ago) or their inherent selfishness.

But in that moment, Liliana Vess truly believed that Jace Beleren would come back for her.

“Well,” She pulled away, already preparing herself for the trip. “I’ll see you soon, then. Don’t be long.”

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this terrible headcanon that Jace and Lili was the sort of people who trashtalk about other people together, from the way they talked about Lazlo. Poor guy just can't catch a break. I pity Gideon, too. Anyway, comments and suggestions welcome (I'm not good at canon stories, and if any of you have any sort of a specific AU that I should write next time, just shoot), and bonus point if you caught the Sherlock reference. Thanks for reading!


End file.
